Public vs. Private

I was cruising through a few different blogs this morning and I ran across the following phrase: "I feel like I've already said too much about myself and fear that someone might get to know me too well. "

While there are most certainly plenty of private things I would never post on a public blog, I am intrigued by that whole notion of how we hunger to be known, yet fear it at the same time. Our social world encourages us to present only a thin veneer of game face facade. Yet for many, there is a deep longing for authenticity in connection with others. However, with increased sharing of authenticity comes increased vulnerability. If our public persona is criticized or rejected, it's not that big of a deal. If we share our true heart and spirit only to find that gets mocked or shunned, the sting can be brutal.

Yet, anonymity feels like the greatest loss of all. To not take the risk to open up to other people is a price beyond the cost of potential betrayals.

Current research has shown that people in America are feeling increased loneliness, isolation, disconnection. It is that very hunger for community that has fanned the flames of blogs, chat rooms and other cyber touching.

In looking at other people's blogs I am fascinated by the level of intimate exposure some are willing to engage in. Most I just click out of and move on, preferring stuff a bit more cerebral. But a few I can't help but stare at fascinated, sort of like rubbernecking when passing a grotesque car accident. You don't really want to look but you just can't help yourself.

As we move forward in the post modern world it will be interesting to see what sorts of human bonds we build as we design families and committees and communities. So many of the old rules of past generations no longer seem to fit. Yet a clear,cohesive set of new expectations simply does not exist.

What does it mean to be a friend? A partner? A neighbor? What are you willing to give? What do you expect in return?