Sibling Joy

I've been in Idaho just over three months now. Each week it begins to feel more like home.

I love my house, and the new job seems to be a good fit. I enjoy the views of the mountains and have appreciated so much about living here. There are a lot of reasons that coming to Boise has been a blessing. But there is absolutely no question that the greatest blessing of all coming here has been the renewed closeness between by big brother and I.

Rather than being limited to a few 1 or 2 day visits scattered months apart after a four hour drive, we now get to hang out, support one another and appreciate each other's company in completely new ways. I was available to pick him up at the airport after a trip back east. He has been there for me in more ways than I can count. Whether we are helping each other out in practical ways or just getting silly together telling stories and laughing after a shared meal, living this close to my bro has brought a mountain of joy into my life.

Then a couple weeks ago we pulled off an amazing coo. We got ALL of our siblings together for the first time in five years, and the first time ever as adults that did not involve either a wedding or a funeral.

We've all had visits with each other in different combinations over the years. But for one reason or another someone was always missing. Somehow having us ALL together at once again, and this time with no emotionally charged agenda of nuptuals or bereavment allowed us all to relax and enjoy each other in a whole new way. We had a delicious time visiting, reminiscing, sharing some great meals and making music. With two of us living just 7 1/2 miles apart we were able to take turns hosting the tribe and it just worked out well for everybody.

They say your family can really push your buttons because they helped INSTALL your buttons. In years past, being around my sibs at times has been a trigger for some pretty conflicted emotions for me. Old jealousies or memories of past slights would raise their ugly heads. But not this visit. We all genuinely enjoyed each other and savored just the right mix of "remember when" and catching up on each others very grown up lives. It was fabulous.

I don't know how much Idaho will continue to be the gathering place for our clan...it may be that we'll arrange other visits to give equal time to the homes of our other sibs. That's fine by me. But for this first precedent setting get together I think it took the critical mass of having at least two of us in one spot to break through our years long inertia of being too caught up in our work-a-day lives to set our sibling relationships as a priority.

I don't expect we'll suddenly start having frequent contact. Beyond the geographic separation of my other sibs (Colorado, New Mexico and California) they each have demanding jobs, families and other things that keep us going in separate directions.

But being here in Boise has definitely taught me what a blessing it can be to build a grown up friendship with my sib here. So I can't help but hope that it will not be another five years till the rest of us all get together again. There is something so sacred about the relationship with brothers and sisters. We're all pretty different. If we just met each other in a social gathering who knows if we'd even necessarily like each other? But because of our shared history and mutual willingness to extend ourselves for each other despite our differences, all of us have been very richly blessed.

The Universe's Quirky Sense of Humor

Ever since I moved to Boise I have been very pleased with how things have been working out. Sure, it has been stressful on a lot of levels to go through all the challenges of moving, especially since my husband can't come to join me for another few weeks. Although he makes the trip down here to spend time with me nearly every weekend, there have been a lot of decisions to muddle through and tasks to take care of that I've had to navigate on my own.

I have had my moments of homesickness and loneliness to be sure. It has also been a bit disorienting to more or less "camp out" in a nearly empty house. I just brought a few basics with me. I have a bed to sleep on and we bought a couch and love seat to go in the family room. But other than that, the whole house is bare. I have just enough dishes, towels and such to get by in a pinch, but none of the extras or personal things I'm so used to being surrounded with. So that has been odd.

My sweet husband brings down loads of boxes every time he comes to visit on the weekends. This last trip down he brought the dining room table and chairs- YIPPEE! I was so glad to get them here. (He'll make do with a card table for the last few weeks he is in Oregon finishing up his work there.) Week by week my gathering of things continues. It has been interesting for me to find what things I miss and what things I probably don't even need to keep afterall. Some of it I may just sell, give away to friends or donate when it comes time for our major move with all our stuff in the middle of July.

So, as I said, there have been a few bumps and some awkwardness and challenges to cope with throughout this move. But overall, it really DOES feel like a fit.

I have been especially pleased with the house we moved into and I really like our neighborhood. There have been several things that have felt almost uncanny with how well this place exactly meets our needs. I'm not much of one for believing in things being "meant to be". I generally reject the whole notion of predetermined fate, preferring the idea that we create our own realities, making the best of whatever circumstances may come along. I believe in owning my own choices.

In fact, in the sociology class I teach I emphasize this a lot in they final lecture with the Sailboat Analogy which I have told over and over for many years. I posted this back in August 2007 for the 300th post of this blog....(Click HERE to revisit.) That little story represents the guiding principle of my beliefs, capsulizing the idea of both personal responsibility and acceptance of things beyond our control.

So imagine my surprise when I found that very concept recorded on the wall of the room that will be my office here.

Tonight my painter friends were over visiting and discussing some projects I may have them help me with next. These are the folks that did such a great job of painting our whole house before I moved in. Sherri said to me "did you find the place where there are words on the wall?" I looked at her blankly, having no clue what she was talking about. She said "There are words on the wall in your office. We noticed it when we were painting."

Keep in mind the third bedroom designated as my office is still mostly empty, with one wall being stacked with packed boxes waiting for my desk, bookshelf and file cabinet to arrive. Because of this I really have not spent much time in there.... Still, I have been in there enough you would think I would have seen something like a pattern of words on the wall. I looked at each room very carefully when the painting was all done and was very impressed by how smooth and clean it all looked. I never saw any words.

So I went into the office and I looked particularly closely to see if I could find what they were referring to. Even then, I still didn't see it until it was pointed out to me. Sure enough, right there on the wall where all the boxes are sitting there are words just about at my eye level. Apparently at some point a former resident of this house had put laser cut vinyl lettering up as decoration. However, when they decided to change the look of the room, rather than remove the words, they just painted over them. It's hardly noticeable. But if you know right where to look, you can VERY FAINTLY see them. In big block letters it says:

"We cannot control the wind"

then, underneath that in italic script it reads:

"But we can adjust our sails."

Go figure. Yeah, I belong in this house. No doubt about it.

Belladonna's garden Continued

I'm getting more familar with the the plants in my garden. Here are a few more of the things that I have growing right now:


Alyssum: Basket of Gold



Malva / Zebra Mallow

Maltese Cross

Salvia


Rock Cress


Lamium


Liatris / Gayfeather / Blazing Star (Can't wait for this one to bloom - it'a a real butterfly magnet!)

And of course there are still more than a few mystery plants. Anyone have any clue what THESE are???


Mystery Plant #1


Mystery Plant # 2


Mystery Plant # 3

And of course there are lots more... I love my little corner of eden right here on the edge of Boise. It's going to be a lot of work keeping up with the weeds, the bugs and just general clean up that a yard like this requires. But the term "work" is relative when it comes to gardening. To me, it's dirty therapy and a very welcome diversion after a long day under flourescent lights staring at computer screens. I get out here to watch the squirrels romp, the birds chase, the butterflies dip and turn and I know I am HOME.

Color me Happy!

As excited as I am about our new house in Boise, I was NOT excited about the color scheme. We planned to paint just about every room in the place, but lacked the time and energy to tackle it. So after careful consideration, we decided to throw money at it. While we were off visiting in Utah, we had some very nice people come paint the whole house. I am VERY pleased with how it turned out.

Guest room BEFORE:


Guest room AFTER:



Master Bedroom BEFORE:


Master Bedroom AFTER:



These are the colors I used throughout the house. The top neutral color is called "oyster" and the lower green color is called "Lemon grass". MOST of the rooms are all oyster. There is one contrasting wall in lemon grass in the living room and on the wall that connects family room and dining room.


In addition to changing colors, I had them remove the cupboard that was over the counter between the kitchen and dining room. That cupboard will get hung in the garage so I still have the storage space, but now my kitchen looks far more open and inviting:



I still need to get a matching piece of wood for the end piece where the old cupboard used to connect, but that won't be hard. I like it SO much better.

It's amazing how much the change in color has changed my feelings about the whole house. I used to think we bought a so-so house that had an amazing yard. Now I feel like we have a lovely house that I look forward to turning into a home.

I CAN'T WAIT!

Face in my Yard

Kudos to pal Jaquandor for sharing THIS LINK to cool photos and info about the Easter Island statues. I've long been facinated by these mysterious faces, even more so now that I have this face appearing in my new back yard.



Not sure what to call it... suggestions?

Idaho State Parks

On the way home from Utah my beloved and I stopped off at two Idaho State Parks. First we went to Malad Gorge State Park. We had a nice walk along the trail and had some great views of the waterfall and canyon.




Then we drove out the loop and checked out the picnic area and playground. Looked like a great spot for a picnic. (Besides, no matter how old I am I still love playing on the swings!)



Further on down the road we also stopped at Three Island State Park near Glenn's Ferry. We didn't spend as much time there, but did enjoy reading a bit about the Oregon Trail history of that area. There is a museum / interpretive center that we didn't go into but may check out another day. We were ready to get home. But it was still nice to stop and find out what was there so we can plan a more extended visit on another day.


















I'm very much looking forward to learning more about Idaho and exploring what the region has to offer.

Utah for the weekend

I just got back from a quick trip to Utah for the weekend. My husband's family has a tradition of gathering for a family reunion each year on the Saturday before Memorial day. This year things were different, because one of the cousins died last week. She had struggled with a tough battle with cancer for the past several months. Sadly, recovery was not to be. So instead of the usual pot luck dinner up at the field in the hills above town we all met for the funeral and luncheon afterward. It was a bittersweet time, sad to say goodbye far too soon to one we all loved. (She was just 63). Still, it was meaningful to celebrate a life lived well and to reconnect as a family.

Then, later in the evening, several of us did head up to the field for an evening weenie roast.









We sat around visiting, watching the shifting light over the field where we gather every year.

My beloved and I took two of the little girls on "An Adventure"...an exploring walk through the surrounding hills examining bugs and rocks and flowers. They learned about lichen and we looked at various animal tracks. Their major discovery was seeing three kinds of poop and noticing the difference in each one (deer, elk and cow.) Oh to be young and retain the wonder and curiosity for all the world they way they do. We all had a great time.

As the evening wore on the sky came alive with an amazing sunset, which is actually pretty common for that place but still never gets old...



It was just a quick trip, but still a very good time reconnecting in the place where my husband grew up, visiting with his family. One of the blessings of our move to Boise is we are closer to them now and will be able to spend more time there than just once a year at reunion time. It's not a place I'd ever want to live, but without question is is a very special place that we feel richer for being able to visit when we can.

The continuing saga of Belladonna's Jungle...

I continue to try to identify the plants in my new yard. Here are some I'm pretty sure what are:

Virginia Creeper (Love the way this climbs up the fence and can't wait to see it turn red in the fall...just have to keep an eye on it because it spreads EVERYWHERE if you let it. Think Kudzu in the south. Yeah, it can be invasive. Still, it's awful pretty so I'm not about to pull it all out.

Hydrangeas This was a welcome present from our nice neighbors across the street!


Rose Bushes & Rhododendrans


Phlox


Peonies


Lamium


Grapes covering the back porch


Oregon Grape holly

Delphinium


Bee Balm / Monarda

Coral Bells / Heuchera

Lilly

Any guesses about THESE??

Mystery Plant #1 (Mystery solved by Kathy Darrow!)
This is Hellabore


Mystery Plant #2 - FOUND IT! This is a Siberian Bugloss,


Mystery Plant #3

Mystery Plant #4
OOPS - this picture is on it's side. These are TALL plants that will soon have flowers on them. I'm hoping once the blossoms come out I can figure them out!

Can You Play "Name That Plant"??

IT'S OURS!

After much looking, debating and considering we finally found a house that met all the criteria we had hoped for that was within our budget. There are a few things I wish were different, but all in all, I'm really pleased with our choice.

The house is your basic late '70's 3 bedroom / 2 bath ranch. It's all on one floor so it is something we can comfortably grow old in. At just under 1800 sq feet it is way smaller than what I am used to, but has plenty of space to meet our needs.

The part that makes my heart sing is the yard:





It is truly sacred space that makes my spirit just feel absolutely at peace.
(We'll see if I'm still saying that after long days weeding and trimming all summer, and raking LOTS of leaves in the fall!) Yeah, it's going to take some care. But that's what I WANT. I spend way too much time inside staring at a computer screen. Dirt therapy is what makes me feel balanced, alive, whole. I LIKE working in the yard. This is a yard to really savor.

So one of my first orders of business is to get acquainted with everything...learn what is planted where and familiarize myself with what sort of care the various plants will need.

Some are things I've had in my other yards so I know them well: Bleeding Heart, Columbine, hostas, Allium, Blue Fescue, Ferns, Rhubarb, Periwinkle and lots more.












































But there are also LOTS of plants I'm really not sure what are. In the coming days I'll be out in my yard with various garden books trying to identify them. For those I can't figure out, I'll post pictures and see if YOU know what they are!

I have much to do to get all our stuff moved here from Oregon and then get it sorted out and figure out where things go. Getting settled into a new place always takes a while. But anytime I get overwhelmed with the boxes, or anything else for that matter, you will know where you can find me. I'll be out in the backyard.